I had a bit of an emotional morning the other day .. at a strange place no less: A gas station..
After filling my car with regular octane, I walked into the store to grab a snack and coffee … and noticed Halloween candy. Halloween candy!? And back to school signs! Autumn!? School buses!?
I have been out of high school long enough to not care as much about the change of seasons as I did then. For years now, the only real difference between the heat of summer and vibrant colors of fall has been the reemergence of buses and children with faces of dread waiting for their ride to the hallowed halls of wherever..
But this year, the emotions will be much higher. Much more real. This year, after all, will be my son’s first year of the real deal: Kindergarten. On a bus. At a school..
My wife told me she plans on having emotions that first day. I casually said I understand and tried to toughen my own upper lip—though I know full well I will shed as many tears of time that she will. Along with that, with my typical mindset, I will have every type of worry flying through my mind.. From now and until forever.
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It really is a strange thing to consider.. After all of this formative years of my son’s early age passing by so quickly, I have become inclined to long for the nights of bottles and diaper changes. My heart aches with nostalgia when I think back to Thomas the Train toys and Caillou marathons. Well… maybe not the Caillou part.
But all of this!? All of this done? Gone? Five years already over? Yes indeed.. and now a new phase of life has come. The school time. Life will change for my son. My wife. And me.
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Life did begin changing this summer. Starting around July, my wife and I decided that not only would Ayden play soccer, but that WE WOULD COACH A TEAM! So we signed up and go the same shirts as the kids.. two games into the regular season already behind us, the shocking part of all of this (more than even the notion of two people being thrown into a coaching scenario) is how fast all of the soccer season as gone as well! Early July, when practice was over, the light of day would continue ferociously into the 9pm hour. Now as we edge towards the end of summer, we begin to see the darkness creeping in… 820..810..8pm.. Slowly but surely, the time of tomorrow is beginning today. No stopping it now. Progress halts for no one.
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The emotional change from one ‘season’ of life to another is most likely shared by what YOU have gone through. OR going through now.
The school year can reap amazing benefits.. or leave you feeling collapsed by the weight of time.
The festival of Samhain just around the corner, as is the traditional highlights of the autumn season.
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Perhaps all of this sounds too over the top? Too melodramatic even.. If that is the case, chances are you never had a child or don’t have one now.. you do not realize the beautiful feeling of holding your spawn close and providing as much love for him or her as you could…
We have a room of toys currently. The contents of rooms change.. The vestiges of the past get dusty. But they all meant something … They all had a purpose. The new future will be filled with homework and tests… eventually adulthood.
I am not ready yet!
I want the first five years of life back all over again.
But the future is now.
And bus doors are opening ever so soon.